Abstecher in die Schweiz

I recently drove down to Switzerland to pick up my piano.
It was the most glorious weather, perfectly sunny, a tad cool, not too hot. I stayed with my brother of course. It was great to see him and Angie again. They cleared their schedule for me and I convinced them to go to the mountains. I do like the Netherlands, but I am Swiss after all. I needed my mountain fix. We drove to the closest one, the Zugerberg, drove up as far as we could and then hiked the last 20 minutes up to the Aussichtspunkt, the Vista. It was spectacular, and I regretted not sticking with my original plan of bringing a picnic along. My bro isn't into the hole sitting on the grass idea. There were several other families up there, grilling their Cervelats (swiss sausage) and having a great time. The view really was beautiful. We could see the outline of the alps in the back.

After the Zugerberg we took a wrong turn on the way home and landed up next to the Zurichsee, where I took a nap on the meadow next to the lake, like I used to when I went to High School and came to that spot for lunch time, while Dave and Angie went off to drink some coffee.


Switzerland is truly one of the most beautiful places ever. I love the frosty white peaks of the alps, the velvety green meadows on the lower mountains, the paths that wind for days and days through the mountains and forests, the fresh clean air and crystal lakes. It is a great place for a vacation, to refresh the spirit.
I'm just so glad I don't live in Switzerland. Apart from being so expensive that it's simply painful, all my memories of Switzerland are tainted by a sour undertone. I loved the scenery, the architecture, the events, but as I was talking to Heidi (an American friend from my first ward, with ironically the most iconic Swiss girls name) about her children and the problems they are facing in school, I remember my years growing up there, and how judgmental and unkind the Swiss can be. I did make great friends, and there are many great things about Switzerland, but I'm glad I don't live there anymore.

Micah's prayer

Everyone tells me that I will look back on these moments when the house is empty and my children are grown and gone. I hope I do. I hope this blog stands that long, so I can read about how darling my children were. This post is just for my own memories, although of course you're welcome to read it.

My favorite time of day is after the kids had their bath. (I know I'm not the only mother who LOVES when her kids go to bed). Typically I'm tired and exhausted, and have to scrape the last bit of energy reserve to first read Ezra and then Micah a book, pray, sing songs, and kiss them goodnight. Ezra is usually ready to go to sleep first, and Micah lingers in the emptying bath while I read Ezra a story. Then comes my very favorite moment. Micah gets his blanky and sippy cup, and climbs on to my lap to snuggle for a story. His current favorite is the Ten Friendly Fish. Getting bored with just reading, I make up tunes to sing the stories to, as most of the text already rhymes anyway. When I'm extra tired I try to hurry the story along by just reading, but I always get two big eyes looking up from under long lashes demanding immediately: mommy sing. After we read the book he folds his hands and I help him say his prayer. He just barely is grasping the concept of being grateful and saying thank you, and when he does it affords me a precious little glimpse into what goes on in his mind. This was his "Thank You" section. Thank you for:
1.Kailea
2.Baby (by which I think he means Kailea's adorable baby sisters Ella)
3.Ducks
4.Baby Einstein
5.Anny (a 2 inch plastic doll with a ginormous head from his favorite show Little Einsteins)
6.Mommy (at this point, I was glad I even made the list)
7.Jesus
8.Daddy
9.Jesus
10. Granny and Ezra

The day's troubles and toils seem to melt away when I hold my darling, innocent, trusting two year old in my arms, and snuggle with him as I sing him his favorite songs. I try to savor these moments, because I know they won't last forever. I used to love snuggling with Ezra, but as he has grown into a preschooler, his need for snuggles at night have decreased. Mine haven't I found. 3 short years.
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Being a mother is so hard. Harder than anyone will ever understand who has no children of their own. The sleep deprivation, constantly repeating yourself, trying to do nice things for them and getting a tantrum as a result...the list that makes this "job" hard is long. But I also can't imagine feeling more loved, and finding a joy comparable to precious moments like these. It makes it worth it.

For my fellow insomniacs

Here a little glimpse into my head. Many nights I have difficulties falling asleep. I lie in bed and worry about my kids, worry about how things will work out for them, for us, what the world is coming to, things I have no control over, etc...in fact it seems that the longer I stay up, the more worries I come up with. Reason seems to go to sleep while my mind is doing pointless laps on a downward spiral. Last night I was particularly tired, still the worries plagued me. It was in trying to subdue them to get to sleep that I had a little epiphany (to which most of you, if not at least Aaron, will say ..."duh"). Worrying accomplishes nothing. All the things that I think and worry about are not solved with me worrying about them. Instead of planning and asking myself how can I make things work, worries only give me escalating worst-case scenarios. All they accomplish is making me sleep-deprived, tensed, anxious, and unproductive. After I realized that I was able to fall asleep right away. How about that!

Ezra turns four October 2009

These pictures were taken by Mark Daams. Thanks Mark.


Good times! I don't know what Ezra will remember of his birthday, but I'll remember the rain and the fun we had. We started out the day with his birthday presents, a brand new, shiny, red bike with training wheels, that Aaron put together for him the night before. (I can't resist mentioning that he really hates putting stuff together, and that this is the first time in our marriage that he put something together the night before a birthday or Christmas. He did a good job though, so no excuses). We also got him the hungry hippo game, and some new books, which he loved. We've read him the Bauernhof (german for farm) every night since his birthday. We were lucky to have Aaron home from work, and so we enjoyed some quality family time playing with his new toys at home and practicing riding his bike.
Around 12 pm we headed over to a supposed Kinderfarm that is right next to his school. It wasn't as interesting as their favorite farm in Veldhoven, but they did have a cute bunny and guinea pig "thing"...a sort of open, themed cage, for a lack of better description. Ezra really likes the guinea pigs, which were very hard to catch, but Aaron did manage. They also had Kangaroos at the farm??? Why I can't imagine.
Then at 1 pm we headed over to his new school for him to meet the class and the teacher. He panicked at first, but then had a good time playing, as did Micah. After Ezra's all time favorite lunch, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, and more Spaghetti, we drove to the Tongelree pool. It is the biggest indoor aquatic center in the Netherlands, with long tube slides, and charming in-pool playgrounds for the little ones, as well as a wave pool. It's a good thing Aaron came with us, because I couldn't handle all those slides. Ezra loved it, and Micah had a blast playing with Kailea in the children's pool. We finished off the day with what Ezra calls the "Happy Birthday Cake". Ever since Micah's 2nd birthday in July he's put two and two together and now knows that birthdays come with a cake. When we told him it was his birthday, he kept on saying ok, let's go happy Birthday cake. I made the cake myself. I checked in bakeries and stores if they have themed cakes like the do in America. They do, but seeing the price of them I had to resist the urge to roll on the floor laughing. They charge the equivalent of $60 for a quarter sheet cake here. The cake I made cost about $5. Not fit for a bakers competition for sure, but it served the purpose. After yummy Dominos pizza we all enjoyed our cheap, but happy birthday cake. The kids fell into bed dead tired. What a blast. Thanks to Mark, Melissa, Kailea, and Ella, for providing us with the company that made this day a real party. The only thing missing today perhaps were our friends in the States.

Ezra's 4th Birthday_2